Lankford Love

I wanted to take a post to write about GriefShare now that I've finished it the first time. {Though I say first time, it'll probably be my last too, as getting out just before Lilleigh's bedtime is taxing on us, but they invite everyone to come back for as many sessions as necessary.} In case you haven't gotten it by now -- GriefShare is AMAZING. Our last meeting was Tuesday night, so I've taken the last few days to process my experience in the program. Basically, like anything else, you get as much out of GriefShare as you put in it. I did the homework religiously. {I didn't do the journaling at the end though because I didn't see that section until the second to last week - oops. I'll go back to that!} I attended every group meeting possible, and I tried my very hardest to be on time for the video in the beginning. {Hard thing to do around bedtime!} If you've ever been through GriefShare, you know the videos are cheesy. They were filmed in the...

My friend Destiny, whom I've recently come to know, shared her story at GriefShare the other night. It wasn't the first time I'd heard her story. But that didn't keep the tears from coming. Destiny lost her brother Derek seven years ago. Coming from a rough upbringing, she describes him as her life witness. I love this label. Though I thankfully had a wonderful upbringing, I relate to this term. The phrase I've so often used is "my other half." I realize this usually describes a spouse, but growing up I think it describes siblings close in age. Austen was there for most everything important in my life, and I, in his. Sometimes when I'm frustrated or laughing at the situation I find myself in, I just want to call him because I know he's the only one that would truly get it. Though I have lots of younger siblings, the age gap is so great that sometimes it seems like we were raised in two totally different families, and to an extent, we have. The be...

Have you heard this song ? I listened to it daily after my brother died. Somehow it brought me comfort. "The hands that hold the world are holding my heart." It's a good reminder. I needed it at the time. And I guess I still need it almost four months later. I began listening to it each morning when we were in Houston as I was getting ready to go with my dad for an early morning Starbucks. Those were sweet mornings with him. I don't know if any of you have ever lost someone close to you, but in the midst of so much pain, nothing else matters. Your whole world just stops. And it's the little things, like trips with a loved one to Starbucks, that really matter. My emotions were so raw then, but I wish I could have that sense of urgency back, that sense that all that matters is what is in front of me. I was just months away from graduating, finals and papers due in less than a month, and naturally I had not started. I don't know how to explain it, except that ...